Why I am quitting my job…
It has been coming for awhile. I have felt it creeping up, but thought I could ignore it.
My family has been missing me – my husband has been missing
me…. and I have been missing out on some very important things.
As most of you know, I work at a church. It is a dream job for me, I created my
position. I have been the Weekend Service Producer for the past 7 years – and it
has become a part of who I am. Unfortunately, it requires time. Its not the quantity
of time I am talking about, although that can be high. The time it requires is when other
people are off work.. when other people are celebrating holidays..
when other people are having family time.
When my family is all off work and available to be together,
I am working.
Every weekend, every holiday..
I only take 2 Sunday’s off a year.
That means for 50 weeks I am working on one of the 2 days a week my husband is home.
In 8 years I have not had a single Christmas, Easter, or Mother’s Day off work…
This has taken its toll.
I am weary, and I am wanting to spend time with friends and family.
I have loved my job, and I know I have done well at it. And I don’t regret
the time I have spent at it. But I needed to find a way to adjust it so that I
was able to honor both my job and my family. If not, one would have to go.
So:
I have spent the summer trying to make it all work.
I have been trying to find a way to work at my job during the week and not
be there on Sundays. I tried to get it to work with me only being there every other
Sunday. I feel like I tried everything I could, and still came to the same conclusion.
It wasn’t working.
I have been praying about this since the beginning of June, when my husband and I first
started talking about it. I didn’t want to take a step without Gods leading.
I believe with all my heart that God says relationships and family are
the only things that last in this life. So two weeks ago
I went in to my boss and gave my notice. September 30th is my last day..
Can we afford for me to not be working?
Not really..
Am I slightly scared about the future?
Oh yeah…
Do I think I did the right thing?
Unequivocally…
This past weekend I had to let my volunteer team know I was leaving – it was hard.
Then yesterday, as my husband and I were cleaning out some storage,
I came upon this:
33 years ago this month, I wore this as I married my husband.
No – not the coffee filter wreath…
I am so blessed in our marriage, and so glad that he still wants to spend time with me.
I still believe in those vows we made.
Me leaving my job may mean that we are in for a little of the
‘For richer, For poorer’
part of those vows, but it wouldn’t be the first time.
I do still need to find a job, but will be looking for one that allows me to
be home when my family is home, and to spend holidays together.
Thanks so much for letting me share this with you – and I would appreciate your prayers.
Pam
253 days ago
Congratulations!! You deserve it!
I quit my job four years ago and even though we do miss the money (especially right now when we’re sending two kids to college!), the peace of mind has been so much more important than the paycheck. Yes, I miss the social interaction, but not the stress.
I wish you and your husband the best!
Take care,
Pam
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Sharyl@Thelittlebrownhouse Reply:
September 6th, 2011 at 7:54 pm
Thank you so much! I didn’t mention it in the post but our son is also going to college (in Nashville!) and that adds to the money fear – thanks for your encouragement!
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Bobbie
253 days ago
I’m so excited for you. I worked at a church for only a year and the Sundays just killed me. I’m sure that you’ll find something else to do that you’ll love.
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Sharyl@Thelittlebrownhouse Reply:
September 6th, 2011 at 7:54 pm
Thanks! Sounds like you understand:)
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Beverly @ The Buzz
253 days ago
I quit working outside the home in 1999. It was a scary step as we had a child in high school, one graduating that year, and one in college. My husband and I sat down and decided on 4 things that had to happen before I could stop working. We both prayed mightily and within 2 weeks 3 of the 4 things had happened. I took a leap of faith that #4 would be taken care of and my faith didn’t fail me. Just a short time after I quit, that last thing fell into place. It’s been so nice to be home for my children and now my grandchildren–and of course my husband. Sure money has been tight at times and I’m tempted to find another job, but then things work out and I’m able to continue to be a ‘lady of leisure’. Good luck to you as you begin this new season of life.
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Cindy
253 days ago
Oh Sweet Sharyl, Nearly 5 years ago I made the same decision. I was the Church Administrator for more than 7 years and got to a point where I was at the church almost 80% of my waking hours as I was also the Women’s Ministries Pastor. It was one of the toughest decisions of my life, yet down in my spirit I knew it was right. I was offered a part time job the night I quit (such a God thing) and was able to spend the next 4 years ministering to my husband as he began the process of dying. I didn’t realize it at the time but now that he has passed away I look back and see God’s hand upon all the decisions and am Thankful! I will be praying for you and your family as God walks you through the changes and allows you to ‘be’ with your family. Love to you as you move forward!!! Cindy
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Linny
253 days ago
Wow! Once again, you’re my hero! I know that feeling of family vs job/commitments. I’ve made that choice a few times over the years, but not to quit my job. We’ve been having some troubles, as my husband has been in and out of work for the past two or three months. God has seen us through it every time things get rough. But, there really is no way at this time that I could leave my job. If I stay one more year, I am eligible for medical benefits in retirement. So, I have to stay. It’s too close to quit. But I dream of doing something else, something more fulfilling or useful or joyful. And retiring to my (dream) beach house. God will continue to bless you. As long as you know you’re doing the right thing, just go forward and open up the new door.
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Colleen
253 days ago
As the years pass, we find that family, time, and faith are more precious than anything else in this world. Your faith has led you to this decision. You’ll have time to spend with your family. You will be richer in every way that counts. Praying that you’ll feel blessed.
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Tammara@ Whisper of Grace
253 days ago
Much grace and continued peace to you. It takes a tremendous amount of courage and faith to follow your heart and His leading when it was that same leading that brought you to that job. Until last spring I worked for a ministry for 16 years and the last 7 years were the most difficult because of the same kind of sacrifices you mentioned that were unofficially required from my family and marriage as I primarily was involved in the Sunday services as well. No holidays or weekends off.
I lost my dad 3 years ago. He lived 3 hours away, and I only visited him about 10 times on a weekend in those 17 years. I regret it. I still struggle to reconcile this within my heart, knowing the leading I had felt to accept the position and thus sacrifice so much.
Because of investments failing and life circumstances leading to financial stress, we also couldn’t afford to go down to one income, but God has been gracious to us every step of the way in providing for us. The biggest blessing has been the peace in our home, in my heart and mind and in our marriage. A tremendous weight lifted off my shoulders the moment we decided to step aside, and I felt it again physically, the last day I was responsible for anything. Even my breathing felt steadier, and I hadn’t even noticed it was off in the first place.
I loved so much of what I did in ministry, it almost became everything, but the moment I let it go, I caught another glimpse of the ONE who is everything. Gratitude wells up every time I look around my home and my life and see that I already have everything In Christ, in spite of not being “in ministry”. Now, ministry happens everywhere I go
Much peace to you in your last few weeks.
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Sharyl@Thelittlebrownhouse Reply:
September 6th, 2011 at 10:14 pm
Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful story with me – your words are so encouraging, and the experience you had with your Dad is one of the things driving me right now. I have a mom and a mother-in-law here who are getting older, and I wish I had more time to spend with them. I so agree with the attitude you have that our lives are our ‘ministry’ as we live out Christ through our actions and attitudes.
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Suzy
253 days ago
I sure do love you. You are lucky your husband loves to be with you. And you are beautiful because you have allowed God to make you that way. Take care, Sister. ♥
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Alison
253 days ago
Just had to comment – your post plucked at my heartstrings!! I want you to know that I will be praying for you, too, along with the others who have commented.
Your ministry hasn’t ended – it’s just taking a different route. Your home will be blessed and God will back you every step of the way as you seek to serve Him by serving your family.
Looking forward to more posts about the new chapter starting in your life!!
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gina
253 days ago
I always wondered how you managed all that you did. It sounds like you are making a wise, well thought out prayerful decision, and those almost always turn out to be good! This post made me emotional for a number of reasons, as I am in a different place in my life in a few areas. I am happy for you and for the opportunity this new change will give you!
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Taylor
253 days ago
I will be praying.
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lynn-oak hill designs
253 days ago
On May 20th of this year I did exactly what you are doing. I had worked for the company for 22 years-my whole life. My job was extremely stressful and not very rewarding at the end. I have two teenagers and I was missing out on THEIR lives and activities at a time when they still wanted to spend time with me. My daughter will be going off to college next fall FIVE hours away. Was this a hard decision? No way. Am I glad I made the decision? HECK YES! I have a very supportive husband and am moving forward with my etsy store (which was becoming too much working full time AND designing jewelry). Good luck and lots of prayers!
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Kathy @ Creative Home Expressions
253 days ago
Congratulations, Sharyl, I think you are doing the absolutely best thing for yourself and your family. Kudos to you for recognizing it needed to be changed. It will require readjusting – I’ve just finished my first week home from having left my job and don’t know yet how not having my paycheck will ultimately affect us, but I think once we are in our new place in Ohio, it will not make much difference. {A much less expensive life in Ohio compared to Long Island}.
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Lynn
253 days ago
I left my job a few years ago and now am going back to work because we really need it for the time being. Luckily it is a M-F 8 to 5 job, and only about 6 miles from my home, so that makes it easier. I think we have things worked out so that the transition will be fairly smooth. My husband is working part time since being laid off in the economic downturn. We have both thought about this for a long time, and at least for the next 12 months, this seems to be the right thing to do.
I love being at home for my family, so it is a sacrifice for sure. I will be praying that another door will open to me and that I will be able to go to a part time job in the near future. Hope things go well for you. I am sure they will.
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Becki
253 days ago
Praying for you and your family. Where there is a will there is a way and you will find that way. Take care – Becki
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Miss Kitty
253 days ago
My job doesn’t require as many weekends as yours but I do have to work every other weekend and lots of holidays as a hospital nurse. I look forward to doing what you are so I can have more time with my children (who are grown and scattered across the country).
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Ruth
253 days ago
You’ll be in my prayers!
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Chlvie
253 days ago
I have been following your blog for some time and I have always enjoyed your humor written in your posts. Today is the first time for me to leave a comment.
I can feel exactly where you are. I have always had a strong belief in God and prayer, but it wasn’t until recently that I accepted Jesus as my Savior. I left my full time job a year ago June and I was so scared because that was income that was greatly needed. I wanted to put all my attention on my business as a designer and needless to say God had other plans. He has blessed me with work, but it’s been a lot slower than I had hoped. However; I wouldn’t change a thing! Even through the “poorer” times, I have had no worries, but that my God would carry us through and my Faith and Trust in Him has grown termendously!
You are so right to let the Lord lead you and He will provide and He will be there for you every step of the way. Maybe not as we hope or as we would like, but in HIs way!
God Bless and good luck to you.
Chlvie
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Kathy
253 days ago
I lost my job almost 2 years ago. I decided not to go back to work. Yes, money is very tight-but I get to take care of my granddaughter every day and now I see her off to school every day and I’m here for her when she gets home after school. That means so much more to me then having that second income. My husband just retired, and some days I do really worry about the money-but I too trust in God to help us figure it all out.
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Melissa Kaiserman
253 days ago
Oh, Sharyl, that had to have been such a tough decision. But I believe that the reasons behind it–especially honoring your husband–will result in blessing. Maybe not financial abundance (thought He will definitely supply all your needs according to HIS riches!), but I anticipate a multitude of intangible ones.
P.S. The line about the coffee filter wreath was classic. I love the way you can inject humor into any situation.
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Katie Daniels
253 days ago
I have been blessed to experience the other end of this story. 2 years ago my mom quit her job so that she would be able to spend more quality time with our family. She quit her job the day I went into labor with my 2nd baby girl. I respect her so much for her decision (and yours) because I remember how hard of a decision it was for her to make. I didn’t know how much I needed her to be around and she didn’t realize how much she was missing. God’s hand has been in every second of her decision and I have watched him graciously and lovingly provide for her along the way. It has been so encouraging to watch God work! I will be praying for you as you make this transition.
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Michelle
253 days ago
I just did the same. I was the kindergarten teacher at our church’s school. One of our children has been diagnosed with a chronic illness and needs to be home full time- so I will be home with her. Medical bills have began piling up and I no longer have an income.
But…
I know that nothing surprises God. He is still in control. He wouldn’t lead me (or you) into a situation that he wasn’t there with me. I know this will strengthen my faith. It already has.
I will pray the same peace for you as you start into this new season of your life- enjoy it. Abundant life is what God wants for us.
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Rhoda @ Southern Hospitality
253 days ago
Oh Sharyl! I know you have struggled over this decision for awhile, I could sense that from your posts. I know it was a hard one, but you are right, family is SO important. You will not regret it, I’m sure another door will open up and you can relax a bit & enjoy that time at home with your family & husband. Those are precious moments! Keep working at your blog, that might be a good solution for you to to bring in a little $$.
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Stephanie Stimson
253 days ago
God bless you Sharyl! It is a hard decision to make…I’ve had to make the decision myself…but SO worth it. Must live each day as if it is your last and that means putting all of your heart and soul into your loved ones.
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cyndi
253 days ago
Sharyl, You sound like a woman that recognizes the important things in life. I wish the best for you. You will be in my prayers.
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Landy
253 days ago
You are making the right choice. The hard choice but the right choice. I may be taking the scriptures out of context but bear with me here. I truly believe that when God spoke to Paul about marrying vs. serving God solely He wasn’t just talking to the apostles. He was telling us all that you cannot serve God all the time while sacrificing your spouse. It will not work. Marriage has a purpose and its value is placed on a high rung on God’s ladder. Take care of yourself and your marriage. We have a short time here on earth with them but we’ll be in eternity with HIM. : )
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Judy
253 days ago
Sharyl, I’m so proud of you and happy for you! I know you have made the right decision. I have no doubt you have blessed your church immensely and made many good improvements for seven years. You have paved the way for someone else to do a good job, too. But you are the only one who can do the job of loving your family. You will find a way to bless your family with income AND your time.
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Pam
253 days ago
I have found that so many women feel guilty that they have to work when they are raising a family. The constant pressure of children, husband, work and not having enough quality time to do anything well. Now in my 50′s, my role is more than mother and wife. It has also become important to be a good grandmother, daughter, mother-in-law,sister, sister-in-law, aunt, niece, and friend. Wearing all of these hats has made me realize that this is such an important time in my life! And I think back on this time of my own mother’s life, and she wore all of those hats with such wisdom and love.This is your time to be what God created you to be for your family. You have so much love to offer your family and God will provide you with what you need. Embrace this time- you are making lasting memories! You are in my prayers-
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Linny
253 days ago
I just got a vision of Sharyl buying out all of the kitchen cabinets and hardware on the west coast. Watch out!! Here comes her home-based business!
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Sharyl@Thelittlebrownhouse Reply:
September 7th, 2011 at 2:31 pm
LOL!!! Now you sound like my husband!!!
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SheilaG
253 days ago
Thank you for sharing such an encouraging word. I worked in church administration for many years and loved it. My pastors were gold and didn’t allow anyone to “interrupt” my Sunday worship with work stuff. I was truly blessed. We moved away and I grieved. I’m currently in a job with a non-profit and really struggling, but haven’t felt God’s release yet. Your words show me, all in His timing. Praying you will find the perfect position with the perfect hours. When my mom was in her last days of battling cancer, my struggle was whether to go or wait. My answer was, you’ll never regret going; you may regret not going. You won’t regret spending more time with family!!! Blessings to you!
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Lynne
253 days ago
I feel for you! I am having the opposite problem! I think I should think about getting a job because my youngest is a senior in high school and I have another son thinking about going back to college and I want to help them out financially, but don’t know how we can if I don’t get a job. Yet I worry about missing out on my son’s senior activities and my grandkids school plays,etc. I just don’t know what to do. I keep praying and waiting for a sign.
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Lisa
253 days ago
Too often we put work first and when it is all said and done family is the most important. I am praying for you and your decision but I don’t think you can ever go wrong when you choose family. Thank you for sharing this part of your life.
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Jan
252 days ago
Life is certainly about tough choices. And when it comes to “fight” or “flight”, my preference is to avoid the conflict at all costs! However, I learned a few years ago that some things are just worth fighting for. My family is at the top of that list – my husband, my kids, my grandkids….. Not everyone “gets it” – not everyone “approves” and when you are a person who wants others to like you, it is hard to be tuff and fight for what you know you must. Saying NO is just tough when you know the perception of others isn’t clear like yours. I have struggled with that – feeling like I had to defend myself. But no more.
I am proud of you for the job you created and “evolved” with at the church but I am also proud of you for listening to that still small voice that nagged at you until you listened and acted.
All of your life thus far has prepared you for a work that God has for you – now you have to “rest” in Him until the focus becomes clear. I know you are already experiencing some “wow” moments as you discover doors opening that you never even knew existed a few years ago, let alone being a door that you could possibly walk through.
Godspeed – praying for continued guidance – stay humble and get ready to stand amazed girl !!
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Deborah
252 days ago
Dear Sharyl,
I was faced with a similar situation four years ago. It has not been easy, but I am so happy to be here for my Mum who needs me and for my two grand babies, Luke 3 and sister Avery 16 months, who I babysit part time. I feel so blessed and grateful for my family. Every day is a joy!
Sending you prayers from San Diego…
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Karrin
252 days ago
I wish you all the best in your leap of faith! I think you’re a brave woman to make that decision. Its hard to make such a big change and leave the comfort of the life you’ve known for so long. Scary and liberating!
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Lynne
252 days ago
It’s always hard to let go and let yourself fall into the unknown. Don’t worry, our Father will catch you.
By the way, is the house next door to you for sale? I would love to be your neighbor!
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melesa garrison
252 days ago
I’m sure you are feeling different emotions right now. It’s always hard to say goodbye to people that you share time with and of course you loved your job as well. On the other hand, I know you must be excited for what God has in store for you…God is so good and exciting! You definitely need to spend more time with your family and your hubby. I pray blessings on you and this new chapter in your life. God Bless you in this journey, Melesa
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Debbie S
252 days ago
I’m late with this reply Sharyl, but I just want you to know that you’re in my prayers. Obviously your family and your faith are the two most important things in your life. Your faith will carry you through this and your family will be your support I’m sure. I’ve always felt if you put these things first God will honor you for it. Hang in there!! I hear blogs can be money makers so maybe that’s your answer to the money, or at least part of it! There are about 6 or 7 blogs that I always make sure to check daily and yours is one of them, I really enjoy it. Good luck, I’m sure you’ll do great!
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Paula Jo @ Home and Garden Decor
248 days ago
I understand what you have been going through. Family comes first, and if this job was taking time away from them and you then you made the right choice. I’m proud of how you tried to manage it all before you completely came upon your decision.
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